If the light in you is darkness...

It takes courage to ask God that question, and listen. And it's a question we should ask often. We are all susceptible to deception and delusion, even the oldest and wisest among us. I have pondered that scripture off and on for many years. It draws me....I grasp something that then slips away. It's something that is coming clearer only in the context of my past. And perhaps that makes sense. It's hard to see in the dark. But the more light I get...the more I see. Jesus did a lot of teaching in the beginning with the disciples saying, you've heard this said, but it's really this way... That's kind of how it looks to me now. I thought it was this way, now it's that way. However, it's not always a 180* turn. Black and white. Scripture is taken out of context and twisted to varying degree's. That's what makes it so subtle I think. But draw two path lines, and just put the second 1-2 degrees off, and down the road the gap keeps widening until eventually, your no longer in the vicinity of truth. I'm not talking perfection. That's a corruption of the idea of Holiness. I'm talking relationship. Listening...asking...adjusting. I'm learning to stop looking for priniciples and absolutes to live by, and live inside this loving living relationship with my Creator,so my path is straightened at times when it gets crooked. So I may stumble, I may wander away a bit, but he keeps bringing me back, because I'm open to Him showing me how I have misunderstood...maybe how I am completely wrong. Deepening my understanding of his nature, his character, his love for the world. It doesn't look like the Christianity I have been taught for the 60 years of my life. And if you want to say I'm rebellious or falling away, then examine my life if you want. See if I am using my freedom for selfishness, to indulge my sinful nature. Or am I using it to love others, and live generously in the world. By their fruit you shall know them. It's really not that hard to discern, if you can drop the idea of being "right". It's hard. I get it. I thought I knew a lot too. Turns out I didn't. But I have a drop of something real now. A pearl. It's worth everything, the loss of everything I thought I had. Today, I'm asking the Lord again....where is the light in me in darkness? I love that I don't fear that question or the answer anymore. I won't feel bad when it comes. It will be the place to invite him to bring light and expell that darkness. There is a wave of delusion today. Its making brothers and sisters feel they are being faithful to God by adhering to a conservative political agenda at any cost, even the values they hold dear. Like, do not murder. Jesus warned the Pharisee's they were the children of the devil, because they wanted to carry out his desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, because their was no truth in him. I'm not asking you to believe me. I'm sharing what I've experienced. Might be a good idea to ask...all I'm saying. Take heed therefore that the light which is in you be not darkness.