Beauty in the eye of THE beholder!

During our outpouring of the Holy Spirit here, God is doing all kinds of things in me. I have always struggled with feelings of worthlessness. What woman doesn't probably, especially American women, who are fed such a warped standard of beauty. But the problem is, all have bought into the standard and judge one another by it also. Yesterday evening, an elderly gentleman and his wife who are in my class, after I finished praying for a women, told me the Lord told him to tell me that He (the Lord) is proud of me, and that though I am beautiful outside, I am even more beautiful inside. I started crying as he was telling me, because even as I was praying for the women in front of me to understand her worth and beauty in the eye's of the Lord, I realized I didn't believe it for myself, so how could I pray for her??? I ended up praying for both of us! If we don't understand our beauty in God's eye's, we also can't understand the deepest part of His love. If we aren't receiving His love, we will not love others, or Him. Earl keeps repeating it to me, telling me to receive it, like he knows I'm not...(because God is showing him I'm not!)
As I wrote this in my journal, kind of sarcastically I say, "God's standard of beauty is not the same as most." And it hits me. It's God's view that is the truth...not America's view. I had believed the lie. God said I was beautiful...and not just internally....externally, He sees me as beautiful too. And you know what? For the first time in my life, I feel beautiful. Not even when I was 20 years old and 110lbs. did I feel as beautiful as I do now, at 50 and fluffy. So America, reject me....I have the eye of my Maker, and He has the only opinion that counts! What's more, as I looked around the room at the hundreds of people attending tonight's meeting, I'm seeing beauty like never before. I just didn't have eye's for it, because I believed the wrong information. We were all stunning! I could see them as He sees them.
God is not a liar, like man, When He tells you, your beautiful...a lilly among thorns, Hephzibah! Tirzah! Believe Him. He always tells you the truth. It's all about what He thinks. And it's all about love. Good bye, self hatred. Hello georgeous! Deliverance looks great on me! (heard that in a testimony!) HA!